Just a Trim, You'll Look Gorgeous....

Claire took intro to cosmetology last year as a sophomore in high school.  She loves doing her makeup and having her hair fancified so we thought maybe that might be something she would like to do as a "career".  She ended up not liking it which is fine but because she took the class I thought she would be helpful with my fro.  I hate my hair - it is thick, curly, and can eat a brush in a heartbeat. 

I like to keep my hair short but still long enough to put in a bun close to the back of my neck.  She did it for me the first time when it was about waist length and I was sick of it.  She cut it up to my shoulders and it was perfect.  That was the last time it has been cut and it was getting long again.  So last night I asked her if she would cut it for me again and she agreed.

Fast forward to me hopping out of the shower and my hair was not looking happy.  Looked more like she cut it with a weed whacker.  As she was fixing it I mentioned something about how she was holding the scissors. 

Claire:  Well she never really showed us how to hold them properly.

Me:  What?  How is she going to teach ya'll how to cut hair and not show you guys how to use the scissors?

Claire:  We actually never even held scissors or cut hair.

Me:  Wwwhhhaaaat?  Well, what the hell DID she teach you?

Claire:  How to braid.

Me:  But you are a terrible braider.

Claire:  I know.

*Sheesh, I need my money back.  On a positive note though hubby just told me he really liked my hair.  He said it reminded him of how I had it when we first met and then smiled.  Awwww.*

Magic Meatloaf Monday

Monday I made the meatloaf with Claire's help.  I really did appreciate her coming in when she did because I don't like to get my hands dirty while cooking.  I know that sounds crazy and Bryan will be the first to tell me you can't excel at cooking when you don't want to touch the meat, mix, or whatever.  I will do it if I have to but I don't like it.

So Claire walked into the kitchen just as I had finished adding all of the dry and wet ingredients to the hamburger meat which meant it was time to mush it all together.  Technical term right?  She starts mixing and mentions how cold and gross it feels.  Little happy dance for me right there since it isn't my hands in there.  I watched and gave tips to make sure everything was incorporated well.  Once that was done I told her to plop it out onto the oiled pan and shape it like a football.

Claire:  A football??

Me:  Yea. Or like a turd....

Claire:  Oooohhh ok.

So as she is molding, pushing, squeezing she turns to me and says, "This looks like Jason's face on Friday the 13th."

I couldn't stop laughing.



The meatloaf turned out good I think.  I really like the sauce you pour over it which consists of ketchup, mustard, brown sugar and then I add some honey because my fam is a fan of sweet.  It is a great addition to counteract with the large hunk of meat.  Last night I made homemade beef stroganoff.  I was disappointed but Bryan and the kids both loved it.

Bubble Rice

White Rice.  Something so simple but for someone who has never made it before, it actually scared Claire and I.  I have made rice before but it was always the Uncle Ben's brand that is in a clear pouch that you just pop in the pot, boil, and voila I had rice.  But when my oldest dog Paris got sick again, the vet put her back on a bland diet and in the pantry was no Uncle Ben's, just a large ominous looking bag of rice.

Claire came into the kitchen as I was reading the directions on the bag.  I asked her if she wanted to help and she said yes.  Pour water in pot, add rice, bring to boil and then put lid on and lower temp - check!  But then the bubbles started appearing.

Me:  What are those bubbles?

Claire:  I don't know.

Me:  Was there dish soap still in the pot?

Claire:  I don't think so.

Me:  Smell the steam.  (My nose was all stopped up from sinuses.)

Claire: *sniff* Doesn't smell like soap.

Me:  This can't be good.  (Bubbles are now slowing creeping under lid and rolling down side of pot.)

I ended up calling Bryan and telling him what was going on while Claire and I stood watching the mess.  It was Science Class ya'll!!!!  He said it was the starch burning off and literally while he was talking we saw the bubbles start to disappear.  Yay for that but someone should really think about putting that info on the bag with the directions for us non-cookers.

At least now Claire and I will know bubbles are a good thing when cooking rice.  =)

Welcome Back Ya'll!!

Two whole years.  That's how long it has been since I last posted.  A lot has happened in that time but that's not why I am back.  I used to consider myself a mommy blogger and although I am still a mom, Claire is 17 now and Taylor is 15.  My how my world has changed.

I want to still share funny stories of things they say or do.  I want to record family vacations we go on or weekend getaways.  But mostly, I want to take a page out of the book/movie Julie & Julia.  Why?  Well because I can't cook but I want to - sorta.  Lol.  The ironic thing is after digging in the world of Google and finally locating my blog, one of the last posts was me talking about the limited things I could cook.  Nothing has really changed since then.  I still cook the same things and the occasional new thing in the crock pot.  I did venture out and make a taco spaghetti on the stove (it was ok) and a tater tot casserole in the oven (also ok).  Bryan didn't try either and the kids weren't jumping up and down.  Taylor has a weird dislike of spaghetti but will eat the cooked noodles plain or smothered in hot sauce.

I am getting off track here.  Back to me trying to cook new things.  I have a love for The Cooking Network and believe it or not have learned some techniques from some of the shows I watch on there.  I don't think I will ever be an Iron Chef or even have my own show but I love the ideas and confidence I take away.  Another thing I wanted to put out there is Claire can't cook either.  I recently showed her how to make a grilled cheese so at least she won't starve once she moves out.  I know when I left home for the first time the only thing I could make was spaghetti and that was literally boiling noodles and opening jar of sauce.

So last Saturday I had my cooking shows on and thought you know what, it is time I start venturing out on the meals I prepare for my family.  They may not always be a hit but hey, you're trying!  I got me some paper and pen out and began jotting down a week worth of meals.  I used handy dandy Google to pull up recipes and search for ones for a beginner like moi.  Wasn't long at all and before my I had Mon-Thur dinners all planned out with ingredients I didn't have in the kitchen/pantry to pickup Sunday.  I didn't think about including Claire in my adventures until Monday night when I was starting that night's meal and she asked to help. Squeal!  Winner winner!!  I am going to end this post with my schedule for the week (yes it is already Wednesday because I got delayed on my posting AND I have only got to make Monday's so far because Tuesday ended up with Claire having a choir performance) and then for my next post tell you what Claire has learned from me so far and our results from making white rice for the first time plus Monday's meal.  Whew.  That was a mouthful.

Till next time.......

Monday:  Meatloaf & mashed potatoes or baked potato
Tuesday: Chicken Fajita tacos
Wednesday:  Chicken Cacciatore
Thursday:  Homemade Beef Stroganoff

Get The Stick Out Your Butt

It has happened.  Taylor is full on teenager mode.  His attitude stinks.  I miss my little guy.  I never know how he is going to be when I get home from work.  Some days he meets me at the door and smiles and chatty and other days, my existence seems to piss him off.  *Sigh*

So yesterday he wasn't feeling well.  He was complaining his throat was hurting so I got out these lozenges I had from when I was sick with strep throat.  Nasty buggers but they do the job.  The kind I had was Cepacol for Sore Throat & Cough.  I decided to play a joke on Taylor and as I held the box up, I pretended to read "I think these will work.  They are for sore throat and constipation."

He looks at me and places his hand on his chest and as serious as a heart attack says, " Yes, that is what I need."  I found it hilarious.

Prolly Tastes Like Chicken.

Saturday evening I was craving me some sushi.  I don't know about you guys but I love me some sushi!  I could eat it every day and I am not embellishing that shit at all.

One of my favorite places to go and eat it is Sushi Choo Choo.  The experience is like none other.  You sit at a bar and watch plates of sushi ride by on this little conveyor belt.  You grab as much as you like and after your're done, the waiter/waitress tallies up your total by the color on your plates.  A super cool idea and it allowed me to branch out on what I would eat.

So back to Saturday - I was looking at a menu online for a restaurant by us that has a big selction of sushi.  I noticed some of the rolls had something called Unagi in them.  I asked Bryan if he knew what that was and he didn't so I googled it.  Here is that convo.......

Me:  Oh, it seems Unagi is eel.

Bryan:  Seal?  Oh no I draw the line at that.

Me:  You've eaten it before though.

Bryan:  Seal?!?!?

Me:  No babe, eeeeelllllll.

Bryan:  Oooohhhh. Oh yea that's fine.  I thought you said seal.

You Are Not The Next American Chef!

I am not the chef in our house, Bryan is.  Now don't get me wrong.  I can cook some things like tacos, Hamburger Helper, and over the past few years branched out to using the crock pot.  But I am no Master of the Kitchen.

Yesterday I put a pork loin in the crock pot for dinner.  When it was done, I made some green beans and Velveeta Shells N Cheese.  Feeling mighty proud of myself I joked around with Bryan saying how I was a Chef now and used my spatula as a wand.  And then......it snapped in half.  I felt like a dumbass as Bryan said, "and that was a good one too."

Men.....

Bryan and I love to watch Family Fued together.  The only downfall is the channels it comes on have terrible commercials.  Most of them are for medicine or infomercial types.  So the other night one came on for a heartburn, gas, etc. product.  The guy was grilling and talking about when he suffers from indigestion or whatever he spells relief.

R-o-l-a-i-d-s

Without skipping a beat and spelling right along with him, Bryan says.........

F-a-r-t

*Sigh* Poor Bambi

Taylor likes to hunt.  It is something my Dad and Step Mom enjoy doing and something they love doing with him.  I do not like hunting.  I am okay with fishing.  I don't mind to much when he shoots birds.  It does make me sad when he shoots deer though.

Taylor is very good at it though.  That and video games so even though I do not like it, I don't want to stop him from doing something he enjoys.  He has been doing it for years and when he shoots a deer it is a big deal for them.  Not so much for me.  The first one he ever killed, my Dad wanted to mount it's head on his bedroom wall.  In MY house.  I cried.  We ended up coming to a compromise where the head was only a skull on the mount.


I do not eat anything that he kills.  Not just what he kills either.  My parents have been hunting for eons and when we have get togethers and they would serve stuff they had from hunting, I didn't eat that either.  I am not vegan but my shit needs to come from the grocery store.  Plus, as far as meat goes I only ever really ate hamburger meat.  I have recently become more adventerous with trying and loving things that my husband cooks.  Like ribs.  But something about a pretty and sweet deer - I just can't bring myself to eat it.  I am one of those people that damn near crashes their car just to avoid hitting a squirrel.

Which bring me to why would my parents ask me while bringing Taylor back from hunting last week if we would like the deer he shot to have processed and whatever....
Are you kidding me??

Taylor told me later it was just laying in the bed of their truck.  So glad I didn't meander back there when we were all talking.  *Shudder*

Another Sign That She Inherited My Math Brain and Random Blondeness....

Last night Claire didn't want to have leftovers so she asked to have a Totino's pizza which is easy peasy since you just throw it in the oven.  My kind of meal!  Anyway, I normally cut it into 4 slices but last night I cut it into smaller sizes.

Claire:  Mom, are you trying to make me fat by giving me more pizza?

Me:  Claire, it is the same size pizza hon.  Just smaller pieces.

Claire:  Oh.

Rylee Roo

Have I told you guys about my niece Rylee?  In my family I have been the only one to have had kids for some time now.  But that has changed since my brother had a baby.  She actually just turned 1 on New Years Eve!

Anyway, they came down right before Christmas and I was just getting over the flu.  First time I have ever had it.  It. Was. Awful.  Anyway, because of my germie self, I didn't get to spend much time with them.  Towards the end of their stay we met them for dinner and gift exchange at Sakura.  Sakure is a yummy hibachi place where they cook in front of you.  My kids love going there and sadly Claire didn't get to go because she was complaining of symptoms that I had before getting diagnosed with the flu.  Luckily I started her on Tamiflu and she was fine within a few days.

Anyway, I just wanted to share a pic of Bryan and I with Baby Rylee.  She was SO cute!  And the best part was loving on her and playing with her but then giving her back to my brother when she got all cranky.  ;) 

Too Hot? Nooo Problem.

So the other night Bryan went and picked him up some wings from Buffalo Wild Wings.  I had gone to bed but having been the closer that day, he was on a different schedule then me.

He picked out Mango Habanero, a flavor he has had many times.  One of his favorite things to do with the leftovers are to snack on them cold.  Fast forward to the other night - I hear him in the kitchen turning on the faucet and then see him patting a chicken wing with a paper towel.

Me:  What are you doing?

Bryan:  They're too hot so I am washing them off.

I could not stop laughing.

2015

So 2014 is gone and I haven't posted in forever.  Shame on me.  Why haven't I?  I really couldn't say.  I think about things I want to write about, or something the kids may have said that was cute but then when the time comes for me to blog about it, I don't.  That makes me have a big grumpy face.

I can't believe that Taylor will be 13 in two months.  Dosn't seem possible.  13 years ago he was born when I was 24 weeks pregnant and he weighed 1 lb 7 oz.  He almost died.  More than once.  Look at him now.  I wish I was still in contact with those doctors and nurses so they could see.  My little Miracle.

Claire will be 15 this year.  To wrap my head around that is still difficult.  Where has that little girl gone?  She got her braces off in 2014 and now has a million dollar smile.  Listening to her talk to me about all of the drama with her friends and boys makes me smile.  All of that is so important to her right now - friends, skating, he said-she said crap.  It hurts my head but it is her world right now.  I love that she is so confident in herself though.  She doesn't take shit from no one and I admire her for that.

I will need to post the picture here but this was the first year Taylor didn't go trick or treating.  Claire went as a homeless person with a card board sign saying something along the lines of will work for beer.  It was funny.  I wonder if this will be her last year.

Taylor had surgery on his legs in November.  We have been doing the Botox injections and serial casting for years but it got to a point where we weren't getting the same results.  The next step would be to have his tendons lengthened.  I let Taylor choose what he wanted to do because in the end, it is his body.  The choice was to continue doing what we were doing or have the surgery, wearing night time and day time braces for a year, and then hopefully nothing else for some time.  He chose the surgery because he doesn't want to have to wear braces on his legs.  The kids at school make fun of him.  When the doctor stepped out of the room, he turned to me and said "I'm going to finally get to be a normal boy."  My heart melted.  He wore casts for 6 weeks after the surgery.  We just got them off on the 29th of December.  He mentioned his toes had seen better days.  He wears "boots" for a month and then we will go back and discuss physical therapy.  We also got a prescription for new day time and night time braces.  He is not looking foward to that but as long as he does what he needs to, should be for only 1 year.

I celebrated my 11 year anniversary with my job.  I still love it.  Bryan is enjoying his new position as an assistant store manager and he is rocking it.

Did I mention Taylor has started growing facial hair?  Yea.  A moustache.  Thankfully he wants to shave it.

So I guess this kinda turned out to be a what happened in 2014 letter but mostly I just wanted to update on the important things that have happened since I last posted.

Here is to another fabulous year!  Happy 2015!!!!

Get With The Program and Blog Already.

I am sad to see that my last post was October 7th.  Bad Blogger.  But, I just haven't felt like it.  Sometimes I want to tell you guys stories about something the kids said or something that happened but when I think about writing it down, it seems to lack the life that it would if I could just SAY it.  Does anyone else ever feel that way?

One of the main reasons I started blogging again was because I wanted to have these memories to look back on one day.  Nothing pleased me more than reading my blog from the beginning and running across things that I had forgotten.  Funny stories or cute things the kids used to say or do.  Now here we are already into November and I haven't posted nothing.  Well for now I will leave you with this little gem.


The other night Bryan and I were watching tv when a commercial came on for jewelry.  One of the rings was 9000.00.

Me:  Look babe!  You can buy me a 9000.00 dollar ring!!

Him:  Baby, you are worth way more than 90000.00.

Smooth Mister.

Scared The Shit Out Of Me!

This morning I was getting ready for work, following my normal routine.  Dry off in the shower, hang towel up, brush teeth, put in contacts, and then I proceed to brush my hair but looking into the mirror, something caught my eye.  It looked like my veins were bulging above my left breast.  I thought I was having a heart attack.  I rubbed it gently but only felt my skin.  I rubbed a little harder and it smudged.  I smelled the color on my finger - it was toothpaste.  Another blonde moment in the life of Nicole.

Trying to Broaden My Horizons.

Sunday Claire and I talked Bryan into taking us to eat at Golden Coral.  I say talked into because we already made a rule that Thursday would be our only "out to eat" day but I had Waffle House on the brain and when Claire piped up with Golden Coral, I was sold.  Taylor does not go when we visit G.C. because he is convinced it is dirty.  When we did make him go, it was a waste of money because he sat and cried into his food the whole time.  He is one picky eater!!

Anyway, on Sunday they had a lot of new stuff out.  One being a corn dressing.  Not something I wanted to try because I do not like dressing but anyway.  The table next to us was a multi generation black family that had everyone from grandbabies to great grandmas.  When great grandma was up getting her food, someone up there must have mentioned the corn dressing because when she came back to the table she announced to their peeps at least 3 times that there was none out there right now but should be in 5 minutes and she was told it was delicious.

To the right of us was a grandmother, mom, and her two girls.  Her youngest proceeded to make friends with another little girl on the other side of the window.  The continued to try and talk to eachother through the pane with lots of "I Can't Hear You" being hollered.  Eventually met up at one of the tables and became BFF's.  Bryan kept singing "Let me tell you 'bout my best friend" and adding in that they met at Golden Coral.

Another new food was something called Kettle Cooked Black Beans.  It didn't look the best but I like black beans and the whole cooked in the kettle had me intrigued.  Back at the table I decided to try it first and popped a forkful in.  It was disgusting!  It took all of my might not to spit it out. 

Bryan:  What's wrong?

Me:  It tasted awful!

Bryan:  I can't believe you even got it.

Claire:  It looks like poop.

Bryan:  It looks like dog food.

Blech.

I also tried what looked like a pickled artichoke.  Nasty.

The Post Where I Admit I Was Being A Brat.

So yea I was just being a crabapple on Friday about going to my Aunt's.  Saturday morning I woke up still bummed about having to drive out there but Bryan suggested I take Claire and when I asked, she said she wanted to go so win.  It actually turned out to Claire, Me, AND Loretta!  My aunt has only seen pics of her since she was born 9 months ago so I was eager for her to meet her.  Plus, my aunt has 3 small dogs and I thought Loretta would have fun playing with them but she was a big party pooper.  She only wanted Claire and I to pick her up every time we put her down and one of the other pups would come and check her out.  She did let my Aunt hold her though. 

They surprised us and took us to lunch at a Mexican restaurant that had just opened by their house.  The food was scrumptious but the no AC in the joint was not.  Then we went back to the house and she already had the two quilts ready to go along with a few pictures.  Then there were the two boxes of China but she also had other stuff for me as well because they sold their furniture, fridge, etc and are putting most of their other things into storage because they are downsizing to a travel trailer.  His job has him traveling a lot and this will allow her to go along too instead of staying behind in their huge ass house alone.

She gave me a brand new kennel for one of our dogs, a whole new set of silverware (never used) that was my Great Grandmother's, 4 pairs of sunglasses which I gave to Claire, enough salon shampoo and conditioner to last me a few months at least, two candles that smell like Heaven, and a bunch of spices and food.  She tried giving me some other stuff as well but I did say no to things I knew we wouldnt use.  She also was giving away a lot of her shoes, expensive shoes but she has tiny baby feet and Claire and I wear 7's in women.  I am glad we went and visited for about 4 hours before heading home.  The drive there and back sucked but oh well.

I hope everyone else had a great weekend!!

PS.  Bryan was a chaperone Friday to It'z with Claire's choir and not only did he have fun, he said Claire spent the entire time hanging with him.  Love her!  :)

No Thanks.

Do you have a mother or father or relative that is always trying to either give you their shit they don't want anymore or to pass "heirlooms" down to you that you don't want either?  I used to accept it all for fear of hurting my aunt's feelings.  The "heirlooms" I happily accepted because I liked to live in the past back then.  Constantly reminiscing about the past, good and bad and the idea of having that ceramic cat my Grandmother made or Christmas ornament that used to belong to my Mom as a child was right up my alley.  But since I started taking Celexa a year ago, not so much.

You might be thinking, maybe Celexa is not a good thing for you Nicole but it is people.  It is.  To not live in the past anymore is Heaven.  To be able to tell someone no without stressing out about it, Double Heaven.  Celexa has allowed me to become the adult I have wanted to be.  The adult with a backbone.  The adult not crying over her past.  Boo.  That is done and done.

So when my Aunt called me this week wanting me to drive all the way over to her house this weekend because she is moving to get some "heirlooms" which is a quilt my Great Grandmother made, a China set that was either my g.g's or Grandmother's, and pictures - You can imagine my excitement.  But when I expressed to her that I didn't need another blanket, and what was I going to do with China she started using the Daughter card.  She only has a son and she raised me from the age of 12 so she is indeed like a Mother to me but still.  Then she went on to say how I can pass them on to Claire.  Sigh.  I finally agreed because I could tell how much it meant to her.

So am I just being a bitch?  I really didn't want these things.  Now I have to figure out where I am going to store them.  Grrrrrr.

Throwback Thursday

My aunt on the left and lil' 'ole me. 

Ooouuuuccccchhhhhh

We were talking about getting stung by jellyfish the other day and how peeing on the sting was a big ass myth and think about all of those poor people who got peed on for nothing.  This reminded Claire the time that Bryan was out doing yard work one weekend.  He was on a ladder cutting back the bushes and hedges when out flies a wasp and stings him on his ass.

He came running into the house, hollering and flailing his hands all around.  I was the only one in the living room so he leaned over the couch while I pulled his shorts and undies down to reveal his tush.  There on one of the cheeks was a bright red swollen angry welt.  He couldn't sit down normally for days and I could not stop laughing.  I still laugh any time it gets brought up.