I Thought It Was Blondes.......

Overheard while Claire & Taylor were playing a wrestling game on PlayStation 3....

Claire: "Just because I am a red head does not mean I am stupid."

Bryan and I looked at each other and said "where did that come from?"

What Not To Do For A Chapped Ass.

I am embarrassed to even show my face around here, and it's my blog! I guess I really shouldn't be considering it since I don't really have near the readers I used to but, I'd really still like to stop by and write down what funny thing Claire said the other day or what Taylor broke this time. I decided to take some time out of my day and do just that, except this isn't a funny of theirs, this is actually a funny of mine.

Back in high school I dressed the part of a cowgirl, being a "kicker" was hip and I hung out with the FFA crowd. My boyfriend was also a "kicker", Ford truck and all. Now if you have never seen a man in Wranglers or worn a pair yourself, you might not know how damn tight these jeans can be. The women's Wranglers make your butt look like a square so us girls would usually wear a brand called Rocky Mountains. The tighter the better.

Now of course if you think about it, wearing these tight jeans doesn't give your lower half much air, and being outside in the hot-ass Houston weather tends to make you sweat, so, it wasn't uncommon for your ass to literally become "chapped". I was in a bit of discomfort one evening so I looked in our hall closet to see what I could apply to my burning ass, and instead of asking my aunt (I was embarrassed), I grabbed the bottle sitting on the shelf thinking it'd do the trick. The bottle, was rubbing alcohol. I got undressed, stood in the shower, bent over, and poured.

I screamed. And screamed. I wrapped myself in a towel and ran into the living room where my aunt was, tears streaming down my face, trying to fan my blazing booty, jumping from foot to foot. I told her what I did. She laughed HER ass off.......

Wishing Everyone A Merry Xmas & Happy New Year!

When I Grow Up.

Claire: When I grow up, I want to be a vetrinarian or work at Target.

Someone Should Make A Warning Sign.

Bryan and Claire were standing in line at the grocery store when Claire decided to casually check out the cart of stuff the lady behind them had.

Claire: You dont want to buy this. (Pointing to the mop)

Stranger Lady: What?

Claire: You dont want to buy this mop because it's only going to sing to you. "Baby come back........."

Starnger Lady and Bryan crack up laughing.

Success!

So I know it has been awhile since I have posted anything and for that I am sorry, it seems I go through stages where I want to post every day and then there are times when it seems like a chore. Anyway, just so everyone knows, my surgery was a huge success. They were able to repair both tubes, I healed quickly and am back at work, now we wait for 3 months before we can start trying so that me ending up with a tubal pregnancy is minimal. Thank you for all of your thoughts and prayers!

Christmas is just around the corner, my how time sure does fly. I ordered personalized Santa letters for the kids because luckily at 7 and 9, they both still believe. Of course there have been questions but so far so good.

Hope everyone else out there in blogging land is ready for a wonderful Christmas!

PS. Houston, we had snow!! ;)

The Singing Bugs

Over the weekend we went to our favorite Chinese buffett and we were talking about Christmas and how the kids really need to get going on their Wish Lists. Taylor mentioned Guitar Hero and I said how I thought we already had that and was quickly reprimanded that we had Rock Band or something like that.

I said someone should ask for a new game for the system we already had, maybe one with country. Claire piped up and said "or maybe the June Bugs!!"

I looked at her with a blank face, trying to figure out who the heck she was talking about when Bryan said, "oh you mean The Beetles?" She said "yeah, that's it!"

Bryan and I both laughed so hard, we had tears on our faces.