Last night I had a conversation with my sister. I am the oldest and she is the youngest. Then there is my brother in the middle. She is in the military and works out there in the La Porte TX area making good money with the oil & gas or something like that. All I know is when I was a kid, my dad was a mill writer and when I told the other kids that, they were all like a what? Same here kids. At that age all I could say was when he comes home, his work outfit stands up on its own, smells, and my mom has to wash it separately. As I got older, all I know is he said I keep the lights on baby. So, I assume my sister does the same thing.
I started off via text, because that is all she does. Talk to text or text. I usually don't care but what started off as an innocent conversation got muddy. I can't blame her. A lot of shit happened in our family when we were children that shouldn't have happened. I spent many years doing the same thing. I would drink, get drunk, and reminisce which always led to me crying. She brought up old memories, ones I had buried pretty successfully, opened new ones, it took a lot, but I did not cry and I did not go to bed with it heavy on my mind. Scars are scars, they tell a story. But I do not want to open new cuts, new sores, new things to fester about. We all three were raised very differently, when we were younger, we were "brother and sister" but after some time, still as children, we were in different homes. Experiencing different things. Being taught different things. At some point we all had awful things done to us.
We all struggle in some way or another, but as I was saying, I have worked very hard to get past all of that. Gonna have to do a part two folks - I have cried twice now. Ugh. Not so much the subject although I felt bad talking to my aunt about it. And then Claire shocked me with a text that caught me off guard. Everything is fine with her, the baby, etc. - So To B continued........... 😢
XOXO ~ Nicole
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