Saturday, September 29, 2007

Funny Kids

Had to share!

Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Google, Are You Trying To Get Me Fired??

Yesterday I had plans to go over to my aunt's house and get my hair trimmed up, one thing that sucks about having short hair now is the upkeep. Before I had even left work Bryan called and said Taylor had came home with gum stuck in his hair. Nice. After much inquiring we could not get a straight answer from the boy as to how it got there. He claims that it was on the bus seat but as Bryan pointed out, he would have had to have been sitting on his damn head for the gum to get where it was.

So after getting off the phone with Bryan, I went onto Google to try and find this cute hair style that I had seen on a few boys at the local pool. I needed a pic to show my aunt so she would know what I was wanting. I put in the search bar a few different things but was having no luck. I then typed in *cute pics of boys hairstyles* and started scrolling through some of the options. What happened next just about gave me a heart attack. I clicked on one option that looked promising and lo and behold if this picture of a woman doesn't pop up onto my screen with a freaking penis hanging out of her mouth. I don't think I need to go any further on what she was doing with it, you can use your imagination. I am desperately trying to close it when my computer freezes up!! I could actually hear my heart beat in my EARS people and I flew up and practically threw my body on the computer screen. What seemed like an eternity (but was prolly only a few seconds) I got the shit to go away. Good grief!!

Giving up on the picture after that little episode, I decided Taylor was just going to have to keep the style (which is just hair growing for now) that he has. I picked them up on the way to my Aunt's and after I gt mine done Taylor was next. I sat in the air conditioned house until he was done and then proceeded to sweep hair while he went into the bathroom to check out his new do. With tears streaming down his face he comes back into the living room and proceeds to tell me how he didn't even get a hair cut! I told him of course he did and he continued to have a melt down and demanded that I go look in the mirror because there was no haircut in there! Turns out he wanted the "bald Pop-pop" look that my Dad sports which actually means Taylor had wanted his head shaved like we did for the summer and had assumed we would just do it. Last night before bed he made me promise that for Halloween we could go over to JJ's (that is what the kids call my aunt) and get his head bald please Momma. I guess Taylor wants to be Uncle Fester for Halloween now! ;)

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Sometimes I Think I Could Be On Beauty And The Geek

I am a huge reader!! I am almost an addict, constantly having 3 or 4 books at a time on my dresser and when I get close to getting low I head on over to the library for my literary fix. I just started a new book called Monster by Frank Perettie ( I was on the third chapter when Bryan came in to tuck me in.

B: Started a new book huh? *Reading the cover* Monster huh??

Me: Yeah I think it is about those things in the woods, you know Big Foot?

B: I dunno, if you go by the cover it could be a bear too.

Me: No I don't think so, they re out there in Idaho in the woods and they have Saskatchewans trying to eat them.

B: Baby, that is a city in Canada. I think you're thinking of Sasquatches.

Me: Ahhh, okay don't tell anyone that okay?


On another note, my last post was my 200TH post people so give it up!!!!!! In celebration, I leave you all with this bit of advice:

Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right, and

the other is a husband.

Friday, September 21, 2007

Two Reasons Why I Adore My Husband

Wednesday night Bryan came home from work a little later than usual. I was already in bed, reading a book when he came to tuck me in and have out little evening chat. He had told me a few weeks ago about a girl that works with him that also works part time at some clothing store that specializes in "big girl" sizes and how he had told her proudly that he was the one that found the elusive bra at Walmart. She had told him shed keep an eye out for me if some bras went one sale in my size. As we sat there talking Bryan told me how he was running late tonight because she had called him at work to tell him that she put aside a bra for me that was on sale and did he want to come and get it? Now what man do you know that went out of his way just to go and get a bra he thought his wife might like??

Then, last night as I was headed to my room I saw what looked like to me a piece of poo in the hall way. All I could think was maybe on the way to the tub, it must have fell out of Taylor's underwear and hell no was I cleaning it up. I knew Bryan would be home in just a few minutes so I hopped in bed and opened a book. When he came into the room I told him about the spot in the hall, and off he went to investigate and clean it up.

Bryan: Looks like human poop for sure.

Me: I dunno honey, I know there wasn't any marks in Taylor's underwear cause I checked it.

Bryan: Hmmm, must just be a Hershey kiss that fell outta his butt.

20 Butts

Claire: Momma, how much butts is this game? *Point at a video game in the store*

Me: Huh?

Claire: *Talking slowly like I am retard* How much butts is this game??

Me: *Finally figuring out what the hell she is talking about* Oooohhh, 20 bucks honey.

Claire: Oh okay, thank you very much.

Wednesday, September 19, 2007


So I went to the school today and met the teacher as he was leading the kids into the lunchroom. I wanted to ask him about yesterdays special lunch but Claire was standing right next to me and I really did not want her to think that something was wrong.

Bryan finally got a phone call back from the v.p. and though she said other teachers do this as well as a reward, she can understand the issue some parents may have with the teacher being a guy. It is sad that is has to be this way but in the world we live in now, you just cant trust anyone.

I sent him a letter as well:

It was nice to meet you today when I came to see Claire for lunch, I know my husband met you at Meet The Teacher but I was unable to attend. I just wanted to touch base with you about Claire and her math skills.

Claire loves to read and seems to excel at that but it seems she has inherited my lack of knowledge for math. Like I said earlier, at Horne they would take her aside and put her with small groups to help her with it. I see her struggling at home and it just doesn’t seem to click for her. Do you guys offer any assistance like that?

Thank you,

And here was his response:

Thank you Ms. Wilson, it was very nice meeting you today as well. I am Claire's Language Arts and Social Studies teacher, but I will forward your email to Mrs. Roberson, Claire's Math and Science teacher.

As for having lunch with the students goes, I apologize for this, and I appreciate your concern. To be perfectly honest I had seen other teacher's doing this, and I did not think twice about it. I can assure you, however that it will not happen again. Next time we will be in the cafeteria with at least two other students. And if there is ever any other concern, please do not hesitate to let me know.


So I guess all in all I feel a little more comfortable now, the v.p. did explain that this is the poor guy's first year to teach so I think he is still trying to figure it all out. But I think in the long run, I would have been a parent if I didnt at least ask right?


I don't think I have said anything about this but Claire's teacher this year for the 2nd grade is a guy and she was just thrilled about this. Bryan had taken the kids to open house and told me he seemed real nice and real young.

Things have been going swimmingly until yesterday when I asked Claire how her day was. She told me that today (yesterday) she got to eat lunch with the teacher. I asked her if she was the only one and she said yes, she was the only kid that got to. When I asked her if they ate in the cafeteria she said no that they ate in the classroom, alone - just her and the teacher. Immediately little red flags went up in my head so I tried to get as much info out of her as possible. She told me he wanted to eat the classroom because it was too loud in the lunch room and how she could eat with him anytime she wanted to. I asked her if he sat across from her or next to her and she replied next.

I was doing my best to act like I was just curious and not a concerned mother. I called Bryan at work and told him everything she had told me and he echoed my fear. He called his mom who is a retired school teacher because even though our first response was to go straight to the principle and demand what the hell was going on, we both didn't want to blow it out of proportion but not willing to overlook something that may turn into something terrible for our little girl.

So I am asking for some advice here, if this was your 7 year old little girl, what would you do?? Would you go to the principal or head straight for the teacher? Even if this is some sort of odd reward system (this is how Claire explained it) we think for her his sake and of course are daughter's, this is unacceptable. A grown man should not be alone eating lunch with one young female student. Bryan is going to the school a little later so I will give everyone an update. I am hoping this is all just some misunderstanding.

Friday, September 14, 2007

Great Dating Video

TGIF, Right??

Things seem to be getting back to normal for us, Claire's red spots are slowly fading away and she is getting back to her happy little self. Today is also payday for me and this paycheck it the first in many, many years that I will be keeping the whole thing. In the past, 700.00 of it always went straight to daycare but this year we were able to arrange for one of us to be home when they get out of school. Woo hoo!! So since we have some extra income we'll actually be doing some fun stuff this weekend with the kids and I will be getting some much needed clothes shopping done. Plus, I can now get my butt back into the dentist's chair ~ not so thrilled about that one.

Taylor did not get to go to his appointment yesterday, with the bad weather we were supposed to be hit with I called to reschedule since his doctor was right in the middle of where it is known to flood. So no news there yet. I hope everyone else has a great weekend!


Last Saturday I went shopping for bras at Walmart, I just needed one to tide me over until payday. The whole family was there because Taylor also needed to have his glasses adjusted. Claire and I went over to the bra section while the boys waited there turn for the eye people.

After searching many racks and trying on as many bras as I figured I could get away with under the watchful eye of the mean ass attendant, I still shit out of luck. Bryan and Taylor joined us and near tears I expressed my frustration to Bryan. I went in and tried on a few others and feeling at the end of my rope, decided to just buy the one that kinda sorta did the job.

I found Bryan at a bra rack that I hadn't really noticed before and lo and behold, the man had found the size I was looking for! Bryan beamed a huge smile at me and was so damn proud about this, he even told people at work on Monday about how HE had found the elusive bra.

What a time that was, Claire feeling on all of the bras complimenting on their softness ~ Taylor asking me what the pink part of the boob is called ~ and my lovely husband tearing through the bra aisles like he was on a scavenger hunt!

At home, I marveled over the fact to Bryan how in high school I was a 36B and then in college and after the kids I was a 38C and NOW, here I am trying to search for a 46D!

Not missing a beat Bryan responds with, "yep, pretty soon you're gonna have to start making these babies at home!" I could have killed him right there.....

Thursday, September 13, 2007

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Crazy Land

Things have been a little hectic here in our little corner of the world, sorry I have not been around lately.

Yesterday I had to leave work early and take Claire to the pediatrician. Since Sunday we noticed Claire had these tiny little red "bumps" on the insides of her thighs. At first, we thought they were flea bites since her and a bunch of neighborhood kids were playing with a stray pup Claire was loving calling "Best Friend". But, by Tuesday the angry spots had traveled to her groin area, under her butt cheeks, and moving on up her tummy.

Sitting there in the doctor's office waiting for her turn, Claire was full of questions and concerns for other children in the room and impatiently wanted to know when her turn would be. I did my best to keep her entertained and tried to give her Tic Tacs because her breath stunk.

2 hours later I was told Claire had a staph infection, and a pretty bad one at that. She is taking antibiotics 3 times a day for 10 days and we're keeping our fingers crossed that it will take care of the virus.

So as you may guess, I have been busy stripping beds, washing clothes, and spraying anything that sit still long enough with Lysol. I will keep you all updated as much as possible!

PS. I also have Taylor's physical therapist visit tomorrow morning!!

Friday, September 7, 2007


I was watching a movie the other day and Claire and Taylor came into the room at the very end, and what they saw was a funeral and then the movie showing the lady's face up in the clouds. Claire asked me what that meant and I explained to her that she was in Heaven now.

Claire: I cannot wait to go to Heaven! When do we get to go Mommy?

Me: Not until you're old and you die.

Claire: And then how long do we stay and then come back?

Me: No honey, that is not how it works. You go to Heaven and stay forever when you die.

Claire: How long is forever?

Taylor: Like 8 days, right Momma?

Tuesday, September 4, 2007

It Wasnt Me!

Bryan: (Yelling from the kitchen) Why is it every time I leave this damn house something breaks?!?!

*He has turned the disposal off and on now for about 10 times and it sounds like it is trying to eat a dinosaur)

Me: I have no idea honey.

*Do you think I am going to tell him I poured popcorn kernels down the drain?? Hell no!*

Bryan: Did you have something to do with this??

Me: No honey.

Bryan: *Muttering* Yeah like when you didn't brake the vacumme by trying to suck up actual limbs from the Christmas tree......

Monday, September 3, 2007

Nice Blogger?

Jessica over at gave me this super pretty award. Thank you very much, I love getting things! But what I love even more is giving things, so here we go...

That is just naming a few, I could go on and on but I believe most people that I read have already gotten their award ~ these are just a few "nice" gals I think should get one as well.

Sunday, September 2, 2007

Spoiled Rich Girl

Please dont ever let my kids act like this!